At Home and Unaffected (10th Anniversary)

by Decomposure

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about

My second LP, originally released in 2005 on the long-ago-defunct Unschooled Records label, back when i was 22 and knew everything. This Important Expanded Deluxe Platinum Masters 10th Anniversary Edition includes a few instrumentals and some hard-to-find rarities from that era. It's also free, so go ahead.

credits

released June 7, 2005

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about

Decomposure Kitchener, Ontario

i live my life differently. i have it together for fish in the sea. but let's go back to the tv screen.

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Track Name: Whose Side Are You On?
pick a place. you’re disappearing disappearing
into that familiar box you’re always retreating to
yeah, you’re a ghost when something bigger something bigger
demands an answer that means thought outside your living room

what’s your line?
black or white?
it’s so easy when it’s simplified

whose side are you on?

look away, the sky is cloudy sky is cloudy
well, not to worry, just snap that premade view in place
because the tv’s waiting just for you with the simple things you crave
watching sitcoms in color, but life without shades of gray

what’s your line?
black or white?
it’s so easy when it’s simplified

whose side are you on?

every problem has just one solution
and subtleties just mess things up for everyone
‘cause there’s just one wrong
and there’s just one right
and you can only win by
taking taking taking taking sides

whose side are you on?
Track Name: Distraction
i'm trying to get this new product
i'm trying to buy some new clothes
i'm trying to see that new movie
leave me alone

i've got to listen to music
i've got to talk on the phone
i've got to know what the stars think
leave me alone

i want another helping
i want to watch my shows
i want to take a vacation
leave me alone

don't think about the big picture
don't think it fits in my home
don't think about what's outside me
leave me alone

i need to buy some more happy
i need to be told where to go
i need to stay distracted
leave me alone
Track Name: Guitar/Trivial Pursuit
Blue is people and places,
pink is arts and entertainment,
uh, yellow is history,
brown is science and nature,
green is sports,
and orange is wild card.

(laughing)
Ow...oww...
don't have your callouses anymore?
Nope.

And you cannot use my laugh in any songs.
Track Name: Buttons and Switches
stay still
we’re only trying to give you help
bite down
you’re not that far away from checkout

don’t cry
we have the tools to make you see
don’t hide
we know exactly where you’ll be

we know your profile and have recommendations
we’re got your wants constructed and nailed in place
we have you tied down for branding
and locked to your group of adopters
so you follow the same worn pathway
we have the spotlights that direct your attention
and, if needed, rats in the back room to turn you blind
we push the buttons, we pull the switches
we know how to keep you in line
Track Name: Disconnect
the jesus i know had a nice home
filled with stuff he worked hard to own
the jesus i know saw those alone
and sad and turned them out into the cold
the jesus i know put business over spirit and soul -
buy more, there’s no such thing as too much greed
the jesus i know lobbied the government so
his teachings could be enforced properly
oooh bop bop bop bop

i’ve got a line direct to heaven that sends me all i need
and there’s no disconnect, i’m always right because i’ve got god with me
your words have no effect, i’m better and it’s clear to see
you’ve got a twig stuck in your eye, the god i know is on my side
again.

the jesus i know closed the door on the sick and the poor;
compassion’s inefficient and weak
the jesus i know started wars for resources,
ignored the death toll and ruled the world mercilessly

i’ve got a line direct to heaven that sends me all i need
and there’s no disconnect, i’m always right because i’ve got god with me
your words have no effect, i’m better and it’s clear to see
you’ve got a twig stuck in your eye, the god i know is on my side
again.

for all have sinned except for me
i’ll hurl that first stone righteously
oooh judgement is mine and i won’t think it through, think it through

i’ve got a line direct to heaven that sends me all i need
and there’s no disconnect, i’m always right because i’ve got god with me
your words have no effect, i’m better and it’s clear to see
you’ve got a twig stuck in your eye, the god i know is on my side
the god i know, the god i know is
me.
Track Name: Multitracked
twilight. the rain taps against the window and turns the street into a mirror that reflects the dull yellow haloes around the lights and the waiting parked cars. it only gets darker from here. and it’s becoming clear the chance that morning reappears has all but disappeared. sitting there silent behind the glass, fast asleep in the tv, unaware with a stare so vacant no light or thought can enter in or penetrate deep enough to set off a spark. keep out the question marks; it’s hard to eat comfortably in my seat if i think there’s something beyond the street. because it’s all about me.

this is as deep as i go. well, i hope. although i wonder sometimes what’s beyond the surface i know, the gaudy clothes and the shallow range from me to the remote...but the volume’s too low. sell me my culture, part of the convergence of vultures feasting on sugar and air in a wasteland where everything has a thousand copies. my cds are bright and shiny and satisfy me today; i play them on repeat in my suv before they evaporate in the tray. it’s the disposable world, curled around me and the shortsighted thoughts and wants in my vicinity; doesn’t hurt me as far as i see, and being selfish never hurt nobody. so ride the circular logic down the slippery slope and see if where you end up justifies the pain and death you leave below. in your poem to power, writing doublethink in your black ink, giggling while you scribble out the margins. you’ve got a sword to back up the pen and a backup plan to evade the charges. now monopoly’s played on a slope, so it funnels back over to the guy with the right start. compounds free of any counterweight check because compassion doesn’t show on a cheque or an org chart. it’s just inertia - make a system out of pushing people down, plundering resources and forcing compliance and dependence on whatever you dictate, with few other choices. got the oversight underneath. keep the pile covered until it reeks. when it leaks, counteract it with a p.r.opaganda sweep to keep the lede buried deep beneath the empty news on page a19. add to the strategy by convincing governing suits that it’s alright with a bribe. on your side, you’ve got another line stacking up high as defence from the beasts shivering outside. keep them occupied, so they can’t rise unsatisfied and try to get across the divide. flood their eyes with fantasy so their bottlenecked minds won’t let reality inside. luckily i’m on the winning side, otherwise i’d be standing on the other side of genocide. he replies, ‘right. god hates a brown face; they waste space, i have faith he wants them all sent to die. don’t think of it in terms of human rights, it’s just efficient promotion of our ideal ideology. we just need a toehold. the painting’s horrible, but it’s framed really well, and that’s all you need.’ so the seed of distortion grows and blocks the sun, untruth and euphemism cloak a system of violence and keep it out of sight, out of reach from the apathetic masses with their glasses off, sectioned off in living rooms watching silence.

well i’ve found god and he’s me; i’m a theocracy. and i ride in my chariot to worship at mecca, the mall. our wallets open and close and sing praises and prayers that rise overtop of the tallest screen. the halls are preened with pastel colors, silver, and light, that brighten the faces of other gods whose vehicles bow subservient outside. the truth lies if it’s not viewed from my paradigm, climbing the milehigh pile of first prize circled by flies, ignoring the chorus of futile cries. i’d rather not err on the side of humanity, i’d rather call you my enemy than accede. i’d rather empty round after round into my feet and then aim for the knees. please don’t bother me, greed’s not a deed that concerns me because newton was wrong all along, and my actions don’t have consequences: i’m walking on air and i’m punching a wall. so i’ll call the cup full and swallow the air that i’m rationed of fashion and passionless play and pray in a box, locked in my seat so my eyes never stray from the game, the same as every other day: ignoring the bleeding, uncaring and carefully keeping unknowing and occupied. the cycle of greed feeding apathy, apathy feeding the hunger for power, a flower that blooms in the distance as viewed from the calcium tower that showers the land with a white light, looming close like a third strike breaking through the windows at midnight.
Track Name: The Center of the World
i couldn’t sleep,
so i walked along the centerlines of the streets
got a coffee and a donut
‘cause time passes faster when i eat
tried to sort through all my thoughts
and keep my hands away from frostbite
i guess the quiet gets to me once in a while
on those black november nights.

well i walked through walmart in a daze
on a crowded sunday afternoon
and suddenly i felt the weight
of what i was walking through
and for one frozen moment
i knew that nothing there could cure this quiet ache
that ‘all you can eat’ can’t fill,
the emptiness the shelves can’t restrain.

i headed home to sleep
and locked the doors on things i didn’t understand
still, sometimes i see the glimmers
of a world that stretches out from where i stand
but it’s cold beyond my borders,
so i pack my thoughts in boxes unread
i don’t watch the stars much these days,
i just stare straight ahead.

i am the center of the world
Track Name: The Wars
work for sunset, turn and yield to night
start over thirteen thousand times
it leaves me weary and confined
the world darkens, i sit here resigned.

na na na na, na na na na na

i sit in a kettle and adjust to the heat
i point at the symptoms when the problem is me

these are the wars we need to fight,
these are the doors we need to close.
strike a match to push away the night
that’s drawing ever closer.
i hope by the time i’m fortyfive
i won’t give up to stay alive
there’s things that must be said and changed
before the world is over.
Track Name: ...Shrugged
his reach could feel for every mile
his thoughts held the earth up to the sky
but he grew cold and forgot why
sunday he slept in and thousands died
when he awoke he closed his eyes
and surveyed his coldness reified
saw pain but could not empathize
for those too small to recognize
Track Name: Saskatchewan (Demo)
well i grew up here on this dirt
yeah i got soil in my veins
and i take pride in all my work
but it’s been years since it last rained
i watch the horizon for a sign
i watch the news for some relief
but only dustclouds line the sky
and i don’t think they’ll ever leave
well we’ve been here three generations
dad turned to me before he passed
but eighty years bring a lot of changes
and this year will be the last
because the earth is just so dry
it cracks and slips right through my hands
and everything i work for ends up dying
and everything i touch just turns to sand
there’s a note left on the table
yeah it’ll be awhile before it’s found
i’ll watch the sky out in the field
and they’ll turn me into the ground